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| Eragon poetry | |
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+15Rahl Fish Head Living A Love Song EmilyNowell kaibo Matt S. eragon5217 DeltaFlip Domia abr Wyrda Spikethechao(a.k.a. Alex) Elliot TempestWings TheShadow Simply Aravelle Zeb 19 posters | |
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Zeb Administrator
Posts : 4559 Join date : 2008-05-29 Age : 29 Location : Texas
| Subject: Eragon poetry Sat Jun 14, 2008 8:34 pm | |
| Here's where you can post Eragon related poetry. | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Here's my poem! Tue Jun 17, 2008 1:08 am | |
| This is one of my 1st FFs I wrote. It's supposed to be repititive, so sorry if that bugs you. Also, it's from Eragon's perspective, and I think you can figure out the rest! The Black Dragon It was the black dragon With menacing jaw Who destroyed his own kind With fire, tooth, and claw It was the black dragon With his master so old Together, they were the cause From a tale scarcely told It was the black dragon With no true friends Who rules Alagaesia His reign knows no end It was the black dragon With scales of ebony Who retreated from his lair, Uru’baen To come and capture me It was the black dragon With endless black eyes Who entered the battleground And dominated the blood tainted skies It was the black dragon So powerful and strong He swiftly destroyed The Varden’s whole throng It was the black dragon Heartless and cruel That slain my love And with her, took me It was the black dragon Heart filled with scorn He was the reason My heart is now torn My life worthless So after the battle I escaped to the sea Forever I left My home and my love All those dear to me The reason I left? You may ask? What was the cause? To think I could have saved her From Shruikan’s menacing jaws I just wasn’t quick enough I was too late And from my own folly I sealed her fate This is to Arya My one true love Wherever you are I hope that you hear this Hopefully, from the heavens above | |
| | | TheShadow Moderator
Posts : 508 Join date : 2008-05-30 Location : Lurking in the Shadows
| Subject: Your ruining Shakespeare's reputation! Tue Jun 17, 2008 2:58 am | |
| That was awesome. I don't have much. umm... Go, Eragon, GO! I'm voting for Yo!
I can draw manageably though. | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| | | | TempestWings
Posts : 125 Join date : 2008-06-11 Age : 32 Location : Avalon, I wish...
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Tue Jun 17, 2008 8:49 pm | |
| Wow! Great meaning, I love the focus on Eragon's heart. Nothin' better than a tragic love poem! Rhyme scheme was pretty good, some stanza issues, but it didn't take away from the poem at all. One constructive criticism though, (and I wouldn't have even known what exactly was wrong if I hadn't studied it in English this year) the meter and the foot were...well, pretty much non-existent. If you can make them consistent then it would be even greater! (You know what I'm talking about right? Like iambic pentameter is a really common one...or trochaic dimeter, dactylic tetrameter, etc.?) | |
| | | TheShadow Moderator
Posts : 508 Join date : 2008-05-30 Location : Lurking in the Shadows
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Tue Jun 17, 2008 9:11 pm | |
| Yah lost me tempest. Let's talk about simpler things. like rakatan tech. or class four HRDs. Or Ithorian language. | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: My poem Tue Jun 17, 2008 10:49 pm | |
| Ya, I forgot to get rid of that large gap. It was 2 pages long and I had it saved on my computer, so that's why the large gap was there. And what do you mean with the metric system stuff? I don't recall ever putting anything like that in the poem... | |
| | | TheShadow Moderator
Posts : 508 Join date : 2008-05-30 Location : Lurking in the Shadows
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Tue Jun 17, 2008 11:00 pm | |
| You know, I'v always wanted an HRD... Any way, Meter and Foot?Iambic Pentameter? To me, it's just a good poem. | |
| | | TheShadow Moderator
Posts : 508 Join date : 2008-05-30 Location : Lurking in the Shadows
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Tue Jun 17, 2008 11:07 pm | |
| Hey guys, matt accepted my picture of Shruikan! Anyway, an HRD is an Human Replica Droid. Ithorians have four throats and two mouths. And the Rakatans built the Star Forge, a superweapon that makes the Death Star look lame. Basically, Tempest seriously confused me. | |
| | | TempestWings
Posts : 125 Join date : 2008-06-11 Age : 32 Location : Avalon, I wish...
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Tue Jun 17, 2008 11:34 pm | |
| Sorry! I'm big on Literature and poetry and English stuff...I probably got a bit carried away... | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: poem Tue Jun 17, 2008 11:43 pm | |
| It's fine. I can be a real picky editor too. I know what you mean now. Thanks for the message explaining it, Tempest!
Last edited by Aravelle on Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:27 pm; edited 1 time in total | |
| | | Elliot Moderator
Posts : 1243 Join date : 2008-05-30 Age : 32 Location : England, Near Liverpool
| Subject: Great Wed Jun 18, 2008 12:01 am | |
| This is a good poem, i never heard anything like it so its really good, rhymes so it good, as tempest said some stanza issues but appart from that its really great | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Wed Jun 18, 2008 12:05 am | |
| Thanks. It's funny, I came up with it when I was supposed to be working on my history homework one night. It just kinda came to me. A writer's spark, I call it. | |
| | | Spikethechao(a.k.a. Alex) Moderator
Posts : 130 Join date : 2008-05-29 Age : 29 Location : Varrock square and sometimes Taverly dragon dungeon
| Subject: stanza bonanza, WHO REALLY CARES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Wed Jun 18, 2008 9:16 am | |
| Who cares about the gramatical issues, i am also obsessed with grammar(though i usually dont practice it) but thst poem was awsume! | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Wed Jun 18, 2008 9:42 am | |
| Thanks Spike! | |
| | | Spikethechao(a.k.a. Alex) Moderator
Posts : 130 Join date : 2008-05-29 Age : 29 Location : Varrock square and sometimes Taverly dragon dungeon
| Subject: MY poem Wed Jun 18, 2008 11:11 pm | |
| i came up with this after i read yours
Once in every lifetime by Alex Cook
Once in a land, of magic and skill, there lived a young boy, who stalked very still.
The deer that he hunted, evaded him twice, No tracking back now, he would be victorious,
Through forests and and mountains, he was lead by the doe, till he saw a clearing, of which nobody knows,
he pulled back the string, on his short bow, he had her now, there was nowhere to go,
But then an explosion, had rocked the charmed land, and so the young doe, had gone off and fled,
that was the day, that fate shined on him, for the stone he had found, was a mystery to them,
in truth it was an egg, behind its enchanted guise, and from it hatched a dragon, of dazzling bright blue eyes,
But now he must flee, for the king of this land, was a tyrant of greed, and quite a madman,
he wanted the dragon, he feared for his power, so he sent his dark minions, to kill our young rider,
through snow and through ice, led by an invisible rope, the trio grew stronger, they were the last hope,
but then on that dark day, the minions had caught them, they were doomed now, till a brave archer freed them,
though the boy would live, not so for his teacher, he died very slowly, taking his secrets with him,
and after that dark hour, no more smiles did they give, they were out for survival, they were trying to live,
driven by instinct, they crossed the great plain, in hopes of finding help, of which none came,
they joined the resistance, it was their last hope, their days of peril were over, or so they had thought,
the monsters had followed them, they were invading the city, all men were ready, it was a great pity,
led by the kings demon, they proved a tough fight, and through the tunnels, a battle erupted that night,
but though they won, they faced a heavy loss, but none so great as the boy, who had payed a great cost,
he was scarred forever, the wicked shade had cursed them, and though he prevailed, a great sickness had hurt him,
but he did not know of this now, they had just won the fight, and that is how a boy and his dragon, saved us all in that one night........ | |
| | | TempestWings
Posts : 125 Join date : 2008-06-11 Age : 32 Location : Avalon, I wish...
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Thu Jun 19, 2008 6:22 am | |
| Excellent summary of Eragon through poetry! | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:27 pm | |
| yes, applause applause! | |
| | | Domia abr Wyrda
Posts : 2063 Join date : 2008-06-28 Age : 33 Location : Alagaesia and sometimes Avalon
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sat Jun 28, 2008 9:59 pm | |
| eragon, young country boy Roam with Brom in company And Saphira, dragon friend Go from home and seek revenge Of Garrow’s death, upon Ra’zac Never shy from dangers great
Always heed your wise old friend Now, when he is with you still, for Death is near to Brom the Rider
Set out for Gil’ead with Murtagh Arrive to find an elf and shade Protect Arya ’cross the desert Hadarac is perilous In Tronjheim meet new friends and old Raging battle, fight your best Always now to bear your scars, Eragon Shadeslayer | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sun Jun 29, 2008 9:08 am | |
| Pretty good. I like it better than Spike's. | |
| | | Domia abr Wyrda
Posts : 2063 Join date : 2008-06-28 Age : 33 Location : Alagaesia and sometimes Avalon
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sun Jun 29, 2008 9:20 am | |
| why thank you i liked spikes though it was random and i like random | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sun Jun 29, 2008 9:54 am | |
| who doesn't? | |
| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:23 am | |
| Did you read my poe, the black dragon? I didn't see any reviews by you... | |
| | | Domia abr Wyrda
Posts : 2063 Join date : 2008-06-28 Age : 33 Location : Alagaesia and sometimes Avalon
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sun Jun 29, 2008 10:24 am | |
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| | | Simply Aravelle
Posts : 3017 Join date : 2008-06-08 Age : 30 Location : Locked away in the castle people call my mind.
| Subject: Re: Eragon poetry Sun Jun 29, 2008 2:17 pm | |
| It's on the 1st page of this thread, and I think it's the 2nd post. | |
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